A Bit About My Relationship With Kai

So by now you are probably asking yourselves (if I had more readers than one at the moment), I thought this blog was about you and Kai? Yes, I know I have spent five whole posts talking about myself. But, I felt it was important that you know where I have come from before I tell you where I am going. If you have been following Kai’s blog you know already that we were friends in college, though not part of the same groups inside of those friends. The whole truth is that for the first two or three years that I knew her it was my goal on some level to break her a little. I know this may sound odd but, I was one of those touchy friends that she had in college, though in my case the hugs were more often than not accompanied by complaining and struggle on her part. I find it interesting to imagine now what she might trade for a hug from me or a small kiss, because back then I would have found it difficult to imagine a world in which she didn’t protest at a simple hug. We didn’t really become better friends until our last year in college. I cannot really remember a particular event that lead to us becoming closer but I imagine a large part of it had to do with the amount of time we spent together, that and for a short time I was involved with one of her closer friends. We began to talk about both her relationships, which at the time weren’t going the way she had hoped but were at the very least fun, and my relationships. All that said though, we still weren’t great friends just close enough that the serious complaints at a hug faded. Even back then I could recognize traits in her that I would want in a partner, granted these were mostly friend related things and had nothing to do with kink but they were there none the less. For instance, she has an excellent sense of humor and can both seem an immature teenager and still maintain a certain amount of maturity about her. I would like to think I can do those things as well.

As you can probably guess, our relationship didn’t change much in that last year of college. I still like to find the occasional boundary line for her and push it a little and I think that carries over into the present on some levels. But, at the time the boundaries were rarely sexual actions, it was mostly casual touching or sexual commentary. That is another thing I really enjoy about Kai, she has a fairly dirty mind, even though it takes her awhile to show it. Odd as it may sound I think our relationship never progressed much until we were far from one another. Even with people you know I think the nature of the internet helps some with openness. I know there are things that in person I might not have shared with her on the same timeline that I did, but with the internet they came pretty easily. We spoke off and on for the three years that we were in separate places. Mostly it had to do with the fact that I was often up in the early hours of the morning when she was around. During these periods we had plenty of random talks and I started to see more in Kai. She became slightly closer as a friend. This could simply be because she was around and we still spoke, as that was something I couldn’t say for many of my other college friends, or perhaps we just started to like the others presence more. There was more of course, I got to see more of the inner parts of her that I didn’t really see much of in college. I am sure you know what I am talking about, the parts that you don’t just share with surface friends. These are the parts of people that I find interesting; double so with her because she hadn’t shared them in the past. I found out that the person I thought I knew in college, while a part of her, was the exterior she showed to people to keep them at a safe distance. It is something I think we all do to some extent in our own way.

Moving on to more current things, when she found out I would be moving closer to the East Coast shortly before her most recent visit to the US from her excursions abroad she decided she would come visit. This was a shock to me because she only spent the time to visit her closest friends or those that were very close geographically. During that conversation we had been talking about BDSM and what I had recently done and how things were going for me in that area of my life. She confided in me that she missed those things, the floggers, leather, and on some levels submission. So thinking she would refuse, I offered to play with her while she was here to visit. Again, I was shocked when she accepted the offer though neither one of us was sure we would be comfortable with that situation at first. In my own mind I kind of made sure that I would be ready for that kind of scene and started to think it through. I decided that it would be best to wait until later in the trip, since she was staying about a week, to play so if it went poorly it wouldn’t color the remainder of the trip. I will say upfront that whole trip is still a bit of a shock to me.

From the moment I picked her up at the airport things were different, not in a way that felt off or out of place but different they were. We were closer, she hugged me with little complaint and we left the airport for my apartment an hour away. I am ashamed to say I don’t remember much about this particular drive home, only that we spent most of it catching up. We talked about what we had been doing and that she was planning on heading back out of the country for after this short stay home. It wasn’t going to be a long trip abroad only lasting several months. There was talk about the friends she had visited before me since we shared several close friends and she had visited a couple of those. It was general catching up, more or less. The first truly shocking moment came when she was more cuddly with me than she had ever been. Our first kiss was amazing. Listen to me I am straying from the purpose of this blog as a window into our kink relationship, but I feel the other parts of it will show you why the kink works as well as it does. She had brought with her a collar and it wasn’t long until she had shown me it. Since we were sharing the scene goods we had I thought I would introduce her to my collection. Much of it she had scene before so I didn’t need to demonstrate on her how it worked or what I would do with it telling her would suffice. There was one particular piece that she was afraid of, mostly because I don’t think she had experienced, or even seen one before that was the violet wand. While I love my wand as a toy I wouldn’t recommend it to new players. So this toy I took the time to show her how it worked outside of a scene, I plugged it in and let her feel a couple of the attachments on her arm and hand, areas that aren’t too sensitive. I think after that demonstration she was a little less afraid and a little more curious but we still haven’t used that toy in a scene. I will go into the scene more in a later post for those of you that are curious. For now I wanted to give you the build up that lead to the scene. If you have been following Kai’s blog you already know that we had slept together before we played which eased a lot of the tension there. Let me be the first to say it was a fantastic night and it also made me smile to hear her ask if she could share my bed for the night. I think that single question has endeared her to my heart more than almost any other single thing she has done. It was also the moment I knew for sure she was a pure submissive and would be a delight to play with.

I will leave you in my story hear as this post is becoming far longer than I originally intended.