Finishing the Rant on Rules

I left you last time with my thoughts on safewords as a rule. I thought I would go over a couple of other basic rules. First there are a few safety concerns that people don’t often think about, like decent strike points for SM play. There are rules about where you should and should not strike on the body. In this I think there are some hard rules like areas over the kidneys, or any other organs including obvious things like eyes and less obvious things like lymph nodes in the underarms and neck. Well for striking the neck should be out for so many reasons. Now there are things that you should know a lot about before you ever strike them and still they shouldn’t be obvious targets, anywhere on the face for instance. There is so much damage you can do with only a little pressure to someone’s face. I know some people think it is a great place to strike for the humiliating effect of “putting the submissive in their place”. Really when it comes down to it BDSM isn’t about no rules and doing whatever you want. It is about calculated risks for the pleasure of yourself and your partner. Everything you do in BDSM can be dangerous is done without knowing the risks and taking the right precautions to make sure you are as safe as you can be.

So I guess the thing that I am wanting to get at with these last two posts is that everything has rules. When you know what the rules are you can decided which ones to bend and break. Knowledge is what makes a good dominant in the end, but you also need the desire to acquire knowledge. The same is true of a good submissive in a different way. A submissive must seek to know themselves and what they enjoy. They should know what their favorite activities should look like and feel like so that if a dominant is doing it wrong they can feel out the potential danger to themselves.

Now that I have said that no one will know everything when they start their journey into BDSM. I wouldn’t even venture to say that I know everything now; there is always something else for me to know and experience. But, there is always something you can learn, before I ever lifted a flogger I knew things about it and how to hit the target and what not to flog. You can read about how to control the tails of a flogger you could watch someone use one and even be trained to do so if you thought it would help. When I picked one up I practiced with it first on a pillow on the air, I got taste of the feeling by hitting my arm with it. I wanted to know everything that I could about the experience I was giving someone else so that I could know how to change that experience. The point of BDSM is to create and receive enjoyment from acts you perform. It is not to endanger yourself or your partner.

I think I will end this rant there for now. It is something that I am looking forward to getting comments on by those of you that read this blog. Perhaps you will help me expand my views and provide me with new knowledge that I can use to further please my partner.